Parenting for Lazy People: Use Your Resources

As we said in the last Lazy Parenting essay, children must be ruled – they simply do not arrive equipped to fend for or make wise choices for themselves. If you are the parent, that is your job – to use your resources, wisdom, and experience to provide an environment in which they can flourish.

Whoa, you say, I don’t have much of any of those! Since I don’t know all the answers, maybe it’s best to just let my child kind of do what he likes.

Pardon me for saying so, but that’s one of the dumbest ideas around. You may not have much wisdom or experience, but you have more than your baby or toddler, at least, and happily you do have excellent resources available to you if you will look for them. (Hint: they aren’t found in most parenting magazines or talk shows.)

Resource #1: You probably already own a copy of the ultimate owner’s manual. It is the one written about how every human being’s life should be lived from start to finish, and the author is not some technical writer prodded by liability experts to include such gems as, “Microwaved foods are hot” and “Do not sleep while operating the hair dryer.” Instead, it is God, the creator of the people he writes about. He knows us inside and out. He understands the time and society in which we live, and best of all He loves us even more than we can love each other or ourselves. He even tells us He is our father, which makes Him the ultimate parent, the ultimate resource.

Parenting for Lazy People: Use Your Resources

Go here first!

Resource #2: Successful parents — You have to do a little investigative work here. Look at their “product” – their kids. If they are young, are they brats? Are they generally happy and content, and not just because they always get their way? If they are older, are they productive, polite, servers, and self-controlled? If they are grown, what is the fruit in their own lives?

When you find some good parents, use them! Ask questions, and listen carefully to the answers. Ask them what they wish they’d done differently. Observe them – what they do and say and what they do not do and say. What is the tone in the home? What do they emphasize? And, yes, where do you see things that could be done better?

Parenting for Lazy People: Use Your Resources

See a great kid? Follow her home and observe her parents!

Whether you know nothing about child-rearing or think you already have everything all figured out, a wise parent utilizes good resources.

In the comments, please share some great advice or a good example you learned from a parenting resource.

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4 Comments

  1. Shanda
    Posted February 12, 2013 at 6:48 am | Permalink

    You are one of my favorite resources! Thanks for being available to those around you, and always being willing to answer questions. :) I just pulled out some recipes that you gave me when I was in the midst of my, “Oh, no, what am I gonna feed this kid crisis.” It seems silly now to have been so panicked over that. Love you, and love the help that you have been to us!

    • Posted February 12, 2013 at 9:38 am | Permalink

      You are sweet to say that, but of course whenever you use one person as a resource you are also using all of the folks THEY used as resources to learn what they know. I think that is such a great thing — that we stand on one another’s shoulders. And, of course, you have taught me many things — patience in trials, greater enjoyment of boys and all the noise and fun they bring, and a willingness to look at things with fresh eyes.
      Lori recently posted..Parenting for Lazy People: The Only Thing You Really Have to Teach Your ChildMy Profile

  2. eddie
    Posted February 13, 2013 at 2:28 am | Permalink

    ok…I see…
    You need a pic of a naughty child and you just ‘happen’ to pick one of Tilly. Now you need a pic of a good child and its one of Trudi’s kids. subtle Yoregg….very subtle…

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  • In My Kitchen, In My Life is a place where women (and the odd male) can be encouraged, nudged, and occasionally kicked in the pants toward living their lives on a higher plane. Oh, and readers get plenty of chances to laugh at the author's foibles, which is always worth a click.

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